


Another Way

by defensorangeli



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Amaurot (Final Fantasy XIV), Ascians (Final Fantasy XIV), Childhood Trauma, F/M, Multi, Past Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:27:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 13
Words: 19,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28093896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/defensorangeli/pseuds/defensorangeli
Summary: Athena Wayne is Hydaelyn's Chosen, but when her curiosity gets the better of her and she decides to listen to the Ascian's story she decides to make her own decisions which will reveal her ancient past.
Relationships: Elidibus/Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Lahabrea/Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Solus zos Galvus | Emet-Selch/Warrior of Light
Comments: 11
Kudos: 40





	1. Chapter 1

Passing the white-robed Ascian’s test was pathetically easy. Garuda-Egi easily took down the mobs he had summoned to test me.  
“Remarkable, truly remarkable. I thank you for granting me this indulgence. None save she who bested Lahabrea could endure such an examination” he began. I pulled out my Grimoire since I was unsure if he would attack me. “Have the laws of man grown so twisted in my absence that it is now permitted to lay hands upon an Emissary? You bore witness to my audience with the Antecedent, did you not? Then you know I acted only in self-defense. I realize the same cannot be said of Lahabrea. Even amongst his brethren, he is considered … unique. Nevertheless, I cannot wholly condemn his misdeeds, for through them we discovered you – one so strong in the gift that she could cast us out. Your Mother favors you still, that much is plain. But surely you must feel it? Her influence wanes and Her strength shall soon be spent. These lands, these people, this world- all shall soon change. As it was, so shall it be again. As it should always have been. Doubt my claims and question my motives if you will only believe me when I say this …. I am Elidibus, Emissary-bearer of the word of the one true god and we shall meet again,” he said.  
“Wait” I called out as I felt the aether gather around him. He then stopped it. “Tell me your motives. What do you mean by as it was, so shall it be again?” I asked putting away my weapon.  
“You are blinded by your ancestors” he replied.  
“Then unblind me. Tell me what my ancestors have not” I pleased. “I cannot doubt your claims or question your motives if I do not know what they are.”  
“Has She not told you anything,” Elidibus asked.  
“She as in Hydaelyn” I questioned. He nodded. “Besides telling me to gather the Crystals of Light and fend off the Darkness, not really.”  
“She would have her children blindly follow Her commands” he commented.  
“Apparently. Now will you tell me what is happening” I asked, beginning to get annoyed with the lack of information I was receiving.  
“Will you trust me?” he asked. I hesitated for a moment while I wanted answers, I was not sure if I trusted him.  
“Yes” I answered ignoring the warning bells going off in my head. He reached out a hand to me with his palm up. I slowly put my hand in his. He then took a step closer to me.  
“Do not let go” he ordered as I felt the Dark aether gather around again but this time it wasn’t just concentrated around him. It gathered around both of us not unlike how the aether gathered when I invoked my teleportation magicks. It was disconcerting traveling in the aetherial sea without an aetheryte to keep me focused so I focused entirely on Elidibus. I trusted him to get me out of this place and back into a physical form. We appeared on a beach. The sand was a beautiful light pink, the sea was crystal clear and to the right the palm trees rose above us. The palm trees seemed to have some sort of fruit on them. It was not a coconut bust instead resembled a large lemon.  
“Emissary, I thought we had come to an accord” A voice called out. I turned around to face the newcomer.  
“I apologize for interrupting your rest,” Elidibus replied. The newcomer looked out of place on the beach with his black robes and red mask. His robes looked very similar to those worn by Lahabrea but his mask while the same color was a different design. It was mostly red but had two while curved lines across the forehead area.  
“And who might you be” the new Ascian asked. He must’ve realized that I could see and hear him.  
“She possesses the Gift. One of Her Chosen Champion but different from the others. She is blinded by her ancestors but does not want to remain so” Elidibus explained.  
“You are an interesting one, Crystal Bearer” the Ascian stated.  
“Athena” I retorted. “My name is Athena, and I would prefer if you used it.” The Ascian chuckled.  
“Emet-Selch at your service” the Ascian introduced himself while bowing dramatically.  
“It’s a pleasure,” I replied.  
“I will leave you here with Emet-Selch. He can give you the answers you seek” Elidibus stated.  
“How will I return to Eorzea?” I asked.  
“I will guide you back to the Source,” Elidibus replied.  
“Source” I asked.  
“I shall explain all. Do not worry time moves differently here. Your friends will not miss you” Emet-Selch replied.  
“Ok” I said since I was not sure what else to say. Elidibus created another rift and left me alone with Emet-Selch.  
“Come let’s find a better location for this conversation. Emet-Selch said, leading me into the forest of palm trees that surrounded the strange beach. Emet-selch led me to a clearing in which a tree had fallen for me to sit on as he told me about the ancient city of Amaurot which he and the other Ascians once called home, The Final Days, Zodiark and Hydaelyn summoning, and finally about the creation of the Shards and the Source.  
“That is a lot to think about” I stated when he finished his explanation.  
“One of Her Chosen would not believe it to be true. She has told you that these events happened differently” he said. I shook my head.  
“She did not tell me anything I wish to ponder the information you have given me” I replied. “I believe you. It’s just a lot of information.”  
“You should rest. I will answer any questions you have in the morning” he stated. The sun had set perhaps a bell ago, but the clearing was still illuminated by these weird glowing flowers. I nodded my head and went to lie down. “What are you doing?” he asked.  
“Laying down to sleep” I replied.  
“You think me that much of a savage to allow a maiden to sleep on the forest floor” he asked dramatically. I just raised an eyebrow at him. “Come” he beckoned me. I stood up and followed him a bit deeper into the woods. We soon came across a cabin. Emet-Selch led me inside. The cabin only had one room. There was a fairly large bed, A small kitchen area was on the opposite wall and there was a fireplace across from the door with a sofa in front of it. The cabin looked cozy. “You may have the bed, dear” he said.  
“But what about you?” I asked him.  
“Don’t worry about me,” he replied. “I can create myself a bed if I wish it.” I did not bother to reply especially since I did not know the full extent of an Ascian’s power. I set my Grimoire down on the bedside table and laid down on the large bed. I had to admit the bed was very comfortable and the blanket chased away the night’s chill. I soon fell asleep to the crackling of the wood in the fireplace.


	2. Chapter 2

When I woke up the next morning my mind was still as conflicted as it was the prior night. I continued to pretend to sleep so I could sort through my thoughts and feelings. I believed that everything Emet-Selch had said was true after all. Why would he lie to me. ‘Because he is of the Darkness’ a voice whispered in my mind. Dark verse Light has been a fight that has gone on for eons but when did the Darkness become symbolic for evil and the Light for food. Night brings darkness and day brings light, but neither is worse than the other. If anything in Emet-Selch’s story the Light was the evil one. Hydaelyn split the world into 14 pieces. She sundered the souls of those who remained. Zodiark is not innocent in this either. The people of Amaurot had to sacrifice themselves but so did those who summoned Hydaelyn. Both of them were Primals and very powerful ones. Zodiark had been summoned to save the world and Hydaelyn had been summoned to control him, but with all this knowledge where did I fit in. I was Hydaelyn’s Chosen, but at the same time I sympathized with the Ascians maybe even more so than with Hydaelyn’s original followers.

“Are you done thinking so loudly” Emet-Selch called out, startling me out of my troubled thoughts.

“How does that even make sense” I asked sitting up.

“It is beyond your ability” he replied. I rolled my eyes and got out of bed. On the table in the kitchen area there was a plate with a strange fruit cut up on it. I walked towards the table and hesitantly picked up the fruit. “If I wanted to kill you I would have done so already” he stated while it was not the most encouraging words it did ease my nerves a bit and I took a bit out of the fruit. The center of the fruit was sour like a lemon, but the white part was not bitter. It actually tasted like the mirror apples from the Source. I finished eating one of the slices before deciding to try and get Emet-Selch to tell me more about Amaurot. I had to admit I was still very curious about the ancient city.

“Can you tell me more about Amaurot before the Sundering and The Final Days” I asked. He gave me a curious look before sitting down across from me and beginning to talk about the city. It sounded like it was a wonderful place to live. “Is this Shard deserted?” I asked him many bells later as we walked along the beach.

“No, there are settlements in other parts,” he explained.

“Part of me doesn’t want Elidibus to return for me” I whispered after we had walked a few more falms.

“Why is that” he asked.

“I don’t want to return to the Source. I never asked to be Hydaelyn’s Chosen or the Warrior of Light or whatever other title I have come to acquire there. I have been dragged into a war that has lasted eons and honesty I’m not even sure anymore if I am on the right side of it” I explained my voice getting quieter towards the end. Emet-Selch was quiet for a few moments.

“If you had the choice what would you have chosen?” he asked.

“Back then to live the life of an ordinary adventurer and Scholar. Now after everything you have told me, I don’t know. All I know is that I won’t follow Her orders blindly. If it was completely up to me, I would stay here away from everything” I replied unsure.

“You must return to the Source” a voice said from behind me causing me to draw my Grimoire before I turned around and saw Elidibus standing there.

“And do what” I asked. “What will you have me do? Just continue on as Her Chosen Weapon, pretend that I never learned any of this, pretend that you and yours are an evil that I must fight against. I can’t do that now! I can’t do that now knowing how much was at stake then … how much is still at stake.” I exclaimed before trailing off.

“There is a balance that must be maintained” Elidibus replied.

“I will not be a mindless pawn,” I retorted.

“Then don’t be” Emet-Selch stated. I gave him a confused look until it dawned on me.

“I will return on the condition that I can tell the Scions about the truth behind Hydaelyn and Zodiark. I wish to tell them about The Final Days until The Sundering” I proposed.

“Now you are using your brain” Emet-Selch sassed. I looked expectantly at Elidibus.

“I do not know if they are ready to learn the truth but if anyone could convince them it would be you. I accept your condition. I would like to know their reactions” he stated after a few moments.

“Of course, but how will I contact you?” I asked. There was a burst of purplish light from his hand before he opened his hand to reveal a silver necklace. He then approached me.

“May I” he asked. I nodded my head and moved raven colored hair out of the way do he could put the necklace on me. “The purple stone on the necklace is a shard from a Crystal of Darkness. Your Crystals of Light will make it almost impossible to detect unless someone is specifically looking for it,” he explained. “Just infuse it with a bit of your aether and I will know that you are calling for me.” I nodded again, tracing the necklace with my fingers. It looked like a simple flower with the Crystal shard in the middle. “Ready to return” he asked.

“As ready as I will be” I replied. Elidibus then created a rift. “Goodbye, Emet-Selch” I stated before following Elidibus through the rift. We arrived where we had left before.

“No time has passed since you left. You may tell them that I was the one who told you everything” Elidibus stated before stepping through another rift. As I walked back to the Waking Sands, I thought about how I was going to tell Minfilia and the others. Luckily Minfilia asked about what Elidibus had told me after apologizing for sending me after him alone. I told he a short version of the story that Emet-Selch had told me making sure not to leave out any major details.

“He was most likely trying to persuade you to join his cause. A strong warrior like yourself would be an asset to them” she stated after I finished explaining everything.

“What if what he said was true?” I asked.

“The Mother Crystal wouldn’t do what the Ascians accuse Her of doing” Minfilia stated.

“How does She explain the past?” I asked making sure to keep my tone even and mostly curious.

“I don’t know but we may continue to ponder this is Revenant’s Toll. The others are waiting for us” she said, confirming my suspicions that Hydaelyn never told her about the Sundering.

“I will meet you in Revenant’s Toll, anon. There is a small errand I must run first” I stated.

“Of course,” Minfilia said. I offered her a nod before teleporting to Limsa. My presence in Limsa would not be strange nor would my request for an inn room which is just what I did. The walls at the inn were thick wood which blocked out most noise and everyone here mostly kept to themselves. Once I was safely in the room, I pulled out the necklace which I had tucked under my shirt. I focused my aether on the necklace and soon a purple and black rift was appearing in the center of the room. Elidibus stepped out of it.

“Minfilia did not believe me and I doubt the others will. She insisted that it was a lie told to sway me” I told him.

“Their faith in Her has blinded them even to the truth” he replied.

“What do I do now?” I asked.

“You continue as you have,” he stated.

“And if I don’t want to. What if I want to help you and yours?” I asked.

“Continue as you have. If you wish to help, then pass on any information you deem of import” he replied. “For now, that is the best you can do since we must maintain the balance” I gave him a nod before teleporting to Revenant’s Toll.


	3. Chapter 3

In the moons that followed I continued to play my part as the Warrior of Light. I fought more Primals and tried to find a spy amongst the high ranks of the Immortal Flames as the Scions worked on a way to try to destroy the Ascians. Every new development made I passed on to Elidibus. He never seemed worried that the Scions would prevail. I also had my doubts that the Scions would ever find a way to make the required amount of aether portable until they did, and I was expected to wield it. When Nabriales attacked, I had to fight him. It was what was expected of me, but I didn’t want to. I fought him, I rescued Minfilia and then I was given the broken staff to gather the elemental aether to destroy him. Minfilia had trapped him in the white auracite. I mentally sighed in relief when the staff failed to collect the necessary aether to kill him but then the Sharlayan Archon sacrificed herself which was then enough aether to destroy Nabriales. I pretended to be unaffected as we told the Scions what happened but once everyone had left to mourn, I teleported to Limsa and got a room at the inn. I once again focused my aether on the necklace before sitting down on the bed. I didn’t know how I would face Elidibus. I could feel my impassive façade cracking as I waited for his arrival.

“What’s wrong” Elidibus asked when he appeared.

“I’m so sorry… I didn’t know what else to do. They were all expecting me to kill him… I didn’t think it would be strong enough. I thought he would break free but then the Arcon sacrificed herself and I couldn’t stop it.” I rambled. I could feel the tears gathering in my eyes. They blurred my vision as I looked at the floor.

“Athena, who is he?” Elidibus asked using my name for the first time.

“He called himself Nabriales. He was after this broken staff the Scions have” I explained. “I can’t do this anymore. The Scions expected me to kill all of you. Please do not force me to return” I pleaded before the tears began to feel down. I felt a weight settle down next to me on the bed.

“Only for a little while longer. I’ll make sure the rest of us don’t cross paths with the Scions until you can get away” he comforted.

“There’s an adventure who can take my place with the Scions. He also has Hydaelyn’s blessing” I explained. I knew that Elidibus was most likely worried about the balance but if someone else could take my place as the Warrior of Light then the balance should be fine.

“I can tell that you no longer have it,” he said.

“A dragon took it away,” I replied.

“I will show you how to teleport to me so when the time is right you can” he said.

“How will I know when the time is right” I asked a little calmer knowing now that I would have a way out and hopefully soon.

“You will know,” he assured me. “Do you think you can focus now?” I nodded in response, wiping away the tears before looking at him. “I want you to memorize my aether similarly to how you attune to an aetheryte,” he said. I closed my eyes and focused solely on him; memorizing his aether until I felt comfortable that I would not forget it. I felt familiar but I could not place where I knew it from. I opened my eyes and nodded my head once I was sure that I had memorized it. “Now when you teleport you will be seeking you my aether instead of an aetheryte. It should not feel very different from your normal teleportation magicks” he explained.  
“Ok” I said.

“If it brings you any consolation Nabriales was not playing a vital role” Elidibus said trying to comfort me. He must’ve noticed that I was still upset about it.

“I still feel terrible about it,” I said, vocalizing my emotions.

“Try to get some rest” he said before getting up from the bed. I felt his aether gather. It was a lot easier to feel now that I was attuned to it, but it had never been really difficult to feel before. I laid down on the bed and curled up on to the far side not bothering to change out of my armor or even take my Grimoire off my hip. I felt his aether wash over my body and sat up startled until I realized that he had just changed my clothes into a soft cotton top and pants that were better suited for sleeping. I saw my armor on one of the chairs at the table and my Grimoire on the table. “I was not going to let you sleep in armor,” Elidibus explained.

“Thank you” I whispered before laying down and curling back up on the bed. I heard Elidibus sigh and felt him settle down on the bed. “What” I asked.

“You are not going to be able to sleep because of how upset you are so I will stay until you do” he replied.

“I…” I began but then realized that I really didn’t want him to leave. I didn’t know why but his presence was comforting. “Ok” I agreed. I felt his aether run over me soothingly and soon managed to fall asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a longer chapter this time. Hope you enjoy. Merry Christmas for those who celebrate.

The next morning, I woke up to the sunlight streaming through the window. I had thought that everything that had happened last night was a dream but when I sat up on the bed, I saw that my armor was where Elidibus had placed it the night before. I did not want to return to the Scions, but I knew that I had to. Elidibus had said last night that this was only temporary which made me feel better. With my mood now lifted, I quickly changed into my armor before teleporting back to the Rising Stones to prepare for the Archon’s funeral.  
Almost two moons of working with the Scion’s had passed before I found my opening. During that time, Elidibus had kept his promise. No more Ascians crossed my path. I was recruited to help defend Ishgard which had resulted in an invitation to a banquet in Ul’dah. I dreaded going to the banquet but in the end, it gave me the opportunity to escape. After being accused of murdering the Sultana and being given an opportunity to flee by Raubahn, I realized that this was the opportunity I was waiting for. Yda and Papalymo stayed behind to fight the Brass Blades and Crystal Blades. I knew that I had to ensure that I stayed behind the next time. My opportunity came when we were in the tunnels under Ul’dah. Y'Shtola volunteered herself and Thancred to stay behind.

“Thancred go with Minfilia. I will stay and fight” I ordered.

“But you are the hope of this nation” Thancred argued.

“I don’t have Her Blessing anymore. I lost it when I was sent to search the Keeper of the Lake, but there are others. There is an adventure named Julius Ford. He is a Samurai and White Mage and also has Her Blessing. I have fought alongside him before. If anything happens to me ensure he takes the title of Warrior of Light '' I stated. “Now go we don’t have much time.” Minfilia and Thancred reluctantly left once they heard the footsteps of our pursuers closing in. I pulled out my Grimoire and summoned Garuda-Egi to my side. While I planned to fake my death, I was not going down without a fight. Afterall I had to make this look convincing. As I fought what seemed like an endless supply of guards, Y'Shtola gathered aether for a spell.

“How much longer” I asked her.

“Just a second” She replied before we were consumed by bluish white light. I felt myself being thrown into the Lifestream by whatever spell Y'Shtola had cast. I focused on finding Elidibus’ Aether and teleporting to him. I felt my body become physical again and saw that I was in a dark unfamiliar place before passing out. I woke up on a soft bed and snuggled into the blankets around me.

“Oh, look you’re finally awake” Emet-Slech’s sarcastic voice roused me from my drowsy state.

“What happened?” I asked, still not getting up. My body was extremely sore as if I had been run over by a mine cart after being hit by one of Titan’s landslides.

“Why don’t you tell us? You appeared before me and passed out from dangerously low levels of aether” Elidibus explained. He sounded closer than Emet-Selch had been. I slowly opened my eyes and saw that I was in the same cottage as the last time I had visited Emet-Selch. Elidibus stood very close to the bed, but I could not see where Emet-Selch was.

“I’m not entirely sure. Y'Shtola cast some sort of spell that threw us into the Lifestream from there I focused on finding your aether and teleporting to your side” I explained. “Before that I was fighting the Crystal Braves and Brass Blades in Ul’dah.”

“That explains the low aether. It is intriguing that you did not suffer any other ailments from being thrown into the Lifestream like that” I heard Emet-Selch said.

“Will you now consider teaching her?” Elidibus asked.

“Fine as if I have not deserved my rest” I heard Emet-Selch sigh as I forced my body to shift so I could be more comfortable. I rolled over so that I was now laying on my stomach. I snuggled into the bed since I was still exhausted.

“She has promise,” Elidibus said.

“And you do not bother Lahabrea to teach her,” Emet-Selch asked.

“I told you she was the one who pushed him out of his vessel,” Elidibus said. “For now, it is not in our best interest to have her alone with him.” I struggled to keep my eyes open. I felt something touch my head and opened my eyes again. I could see the white and gold of Elidibus' sleeve.

“What” I asked.

“Go back to sleep. You will need rest to restore your aether” he said as he ran his clawed gloves through my hair in a calming manner. I could feel myself drifting to sleep again as I stopped fighting to stay awake. The next time I woke up it was only Emet-Selch in the room. I felt a bit better but could tell that my aether was still low.

“Here eat this. Once your aether is back to normal levels we will begin your training since Elidibus insists that your fragmented soul will be able to learn our magicks” Emet-Selch said.

“I apologize for interrupting your rest. It was never my intent.” I said, taking the bowl that Emet-Selch was holding.

“We shall see if our Honorable Emissary is correct about your ability” he said as I ate the stew he had given me. It tasted pretty bland, but not terrible. I did not realize how hungry I was until I took the first bite. I ate the entire bowl before it disappeared from my hands. I looked at Emet-Selch questioningly. “Creation magicks” he replied. I attempted to get out of bed, but it took a few attempts for my body to respond the way I wanted it too. I did finally manage to get up.

“Is there somewhere I could bathe” I asked meekly. I felt bad asking him for anything. I already felt like a burden for interrupting his rest. His gaze softened.

“Of course,” he said, gesturing dramatically for me to follow him. I followed him out of the cabin and towards a smaller cabin right by the one we were staying in. I opened the door. Inside there was a hot tub. I hear a snap behind me. I turned around and saw that Emet-Selch now had a pile of clothes in his hand.

“Thank you,” I said, accepting the clothes. 

“I trust that you will be able to find your way back to the cottage without assistance” he said condescendingly. I nodded my head. He then turned around and left. I set the clothes down on a low shelf near the hot tub. I took off my clothes and used the facilities before entering the hot tub. At first, I thought that there had to be a facet somewhere but then realized that it was a small natural hot spring which on the bottom had a current of water. I sat on a small bench made of stone and let the heat sooth my body. I wish I had some soap to help me get rid of the grim that had built up on my skin, but I was not going to be greedy. Just being able to soak in the tub helped me feel cleaner. I was in awe at Emet-Selch’s display of his Creation Magicks. He had mentioned them when he told me the history of Amaurot, but I had not realized just how powerful they were until he seemed to effortlessly use them. These were the people that the Scion expected me to destroy. People who could just snap and create food and clothes. Sure, the food wasn’t as tasty as a home cooked meal, but it still provided substance and nourishment. It was difficult to imagine a whole society of people who could wield these magicks as effortlessly as Emet-Selch. He had explained that he was a member of the Convocation which was the group of Fourteen individuals in charge of Amaurot so maybe he was just stronger than the others, but still it made the rest of us seem inferior. Sure, I could summon my Egi’s to fight with me, but I needed my Grimoire for that. I was basically useless without it to help me channel my aether. No wonder why Emet-Selch did not seem pleased to teach me his magicks, but Elidibus seemed to have faith that I would be able to learn Creation Magicks. I guess the only way to find out was to get my aether levels back to normal and try. I would give it my all to learn these ancient magicks. 

After I felt like I had soaked in the hot water for long enough, I stood up and got out of the hot tub. I reached for the clothes but when I pulled off the first item which I then realized was a towel, I realized that there was a small glass bottle under it. I grabbed at the bottle and saw that there was a small inscription on it that said soap. I laughed. Apparently Emet-Selch had even been considerate enough to provide me with soap. I grabbed the bottle and entered the hot tub once again. I uncorked the bottle and poured a bit of the thick liquid into my right hand. The liquid had a pleasant smell. It smelled like cinnamon and vanilla but also another scent that I could not place. It smelled very familiar but at the same time I knew that I had no memory of ever smelling anything quite like it. It confused me, but that was something I would dwell on later for now I would focus on getting clean and returning to the cottage before Emet-Selch came looking for me. I rubbed the liquid on my arm and it slightly foamed up. I quickly washed the rest of my body and even my hair with the soap before getting out of the hot tub for the second time. I dried off with the provided towel and then hung it up on the hook next to the shelf to dry before changing into the garments. I blushed when I saw that Emet-Selch had created small clothes which I quickly put on before picking up the pants he had created. They were plain linen pants and so was the tunic. I donned both items before slipping my shoes on again and leaving the small building. I walked quickly back to the cottage since the sun had already set and I was unsure if there were any beasts in this area. I had left my Grimoire in the cottage like a fool. When I entered the cottage, I noticed that there was now another smaller bed near the fireplace. Emet-Selch was laying on the bigger bed still in his robe and mask. He didn’t move as I entered so I assumed that he was asleep as I quietly creeped towards the smaller bed and made myself comfortable. I doubted that I had been up for more than two bells, but I was still exhausted, so I laid down and quickly fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

It took a few more days for my aether levels to come back to normal. Elidibus wasn’t kidding when he said that my aether levels were dangerously low. Each day I was able to stay awake for longer as my aether normalized.

“After you finish eating, I will begin to teach you how to use your aether,” Emet-Selch said as I sat at the table eating the meal he had conjured.

“Thank you” I said after I had swallowed the bit of food I was chewing. Over the past few days, he had seemed to warm up to me or at least was not as annoyed that I was interrupting his rest, but I was still very grateful for everything that he had done. I quickly finished the rest of my food since I was excited to learn whatever he was willing to teach me.

“Here put this on” he said, handing me a robe he had conjured. I hesitated for a moment. He sighed in response. “I will not look if that is what you are worried about,” he said turning around to give me a small amount of privacy as I changed into the plain black robe. It was a similar style to the one he and Elidibus wore but without the ornaments or purple designs.

“I’m done” I told him once I had finished changing. I folded my linen clothes and placed them on my bed.

“Good, now follow me” he said and walked out of the cottage. I had to jog to catch up to his much longer strides.   
We stopped in a clearing not too far from the cottage.

“This place should suffice,” he said. “How much control do you have over your aether?”

“I use it to heal and fight by channeling through a Grimoire” I replied.

“At least I’m not starting with someone who has no knowledge of aether, but what I am going to attempt to teach you will not require you channeling your aether” he mumbled. “I want you to try to call upon your aether without your Grimoire.”

“How do I do that?” I asked.

“Try focusing your aether like you would with your Grimoire” he said. I closed my eyes and tried but nothing happened. I heard him sigh as I opened my eyes. “Do you remember what your aether feels like when you use your Grimoire?” he asked. I nodded my head. “Now close your eyes again and focus on that feeling. Try to create that same feeling but without a catalyst like your Grimoire.” I closed my eyes again and tried but I could not call upon that same feeling that I had with my Grimoire. “Keep trying. I won’t be able to teach you anything else until you have mastered the ability to control your aether at will” he explained. I nodded my head and tried focusing again and again, but it was always the same result until Emet-Selch would tell me it was time to return to the cottage. I would then bathe and eat supper before curling up in bed. The attempts to control my aether made me exhausted. Day after day we went through the same routine, but I felt like I wasn’t getting anywhere. I could tell that Emet-Selch was also getting increasingly frustrated by my lack of improvement. I was as well. Almost a moon had passed in this fashion before our frustration reached the breaking point.

“Elidibus thinks this fractured being could wield our magicks when she can’t even master the fundamentals taught to children before they enter the Akadaemia” I heard Emet-Selch say as I tried to focus again on summoning up my aether.

“How many years did those children have before they entered Akadaemia?” I asked him, opening my eyes.

“A few centuries perhaps” he replied.

“I will not even live to be a few centuries old. I know that I am sundered, fractured, but I am giving this my all. I want to learn. I know I will never reach the same level as you or yours, but I will give it my all so I can reach my full potential” I hissed at him. His eyes widened minutely. “I don’t want to be fractured. I don’t want to be limited in power …”

“Athena” Emet-Selch interrupted me. I glared at him. I was so frustrated that his unkind words had made me furious at him. 

“I need you to remember this feeling right now.” I gave him a confused look.

“My anger” I asked.

“No,” he said, shaking his head. “The feeling of controlling your aether.”

“What” I asked. He gestured to the area by my feet and when I looked down, I could see the green swirls of aether wrapping themselves around my legs like they would for some of my healing spells.

“It’s a start we can work with but only if you can learn to do this with focus instead of emotional outbursts” he said. A small smile graced my face at my small achievement.

“I will,” I said. I was too excited to be mad at him any longer.

“Now try again to see if you can summon your aether while being calm” he said. I nodded and tried again. It seemed as if in my emotional outburst I had broken through whatever had been stopping me from accessing my aether without my Grimoire before. Each try I was able to summon a bit more aether until I was exhausted. “Come let’s call it an early night. You have exhausted your aether reserves but have made a decent amount of progress” he praised. We walked back to the cottage so I could grab my change of clothes and bathe. I was definitely taking up Emet-Selch’s suggestion of an early night since I was exhausted. I knew that my aether reserves were not dangerously low, but they were lower than normal. I had exhausted my aether at a faster rate than it could regenerate, but I had finally made progress and that was all that mattered. The warm water felt like heaven on my skin after the long day. I wondered what was blocking me from being able to use my aether. Maybe Emet-Selch had some sort of theory. After washing myself with the very familiar soap and dressing again, I returned to the cottage where Emet-Selch had a dinner conjured for me to eat.

“Do you eat” I asked him. It had just occurred to me that I had never seen him eat.

“I do not require sustenance, but I do enjoy the occasional meal” he replied.

“Could we maybe go to one of the villages on this Shard so I could buy some ingredients to make us a meal?” I asked him.

“You are well versed in the art of the culinarians” he asked.

“I’m not amazing but I can cook us some meals” I replied shyly.

“Tomorrow we will visit the closest village” he stated as I finished up my meal. After my meal I crawled into bed and quickly fell asleep. I was excited to be able to see more of this strange Shard that would become my home at least for the time being.


	6. Chapter 6

I woke up as the sun rose the following day. Emet-Selch was still asleep with his back towards me and his hood covering his hair. While the robe he used to sleep in did not have ornaments like his other robe it must’ve still been uncomfortable to constantly sleep with your head covered. I wonder why he always kept the hood up, but it was not a pressing concern and I did not want to upset him again. I stayed in bed and tried to control my aether a bit while I waited for him to wake up. I did not want to exhaust myself since I was really looking forward to seeing the nearby village, but at the same time I wanted to improve my aether control. I wanted to prove that Elidibus was right to believe that I could learn the Eldritch Magicks that Emet-Selch could wield. I also knew that Lahabrea could wield these Ancient Magicks but was yet unsure of how powerful Elidibus was. He had tested me with those beasts and weaker Ascians but other than that I had never seen him fight or use other magicks. It also made me wonder why he wasn’t teaching me himself. I thought back to the conversation when I woke up for the first time after teleporting to Elidibus. Emet-Selch had asked why Lahabrea wasn’t teaching me. Was Lahabrea a better teacher or did Emet-Selch just want to hand me over to someone else so he could rest? I sighed quietly. I would not be able to answer these questions on my own. Emet-Selch finally woke up about a bell later.

“How long have you been awake for” he asked.

“About a bell” I replied. “I didn’t want to get out of bed because I didn’t want to wake you.”

“That’s considerate of you” he mused. “Let’s get this trip over with then. I will warn you that others will not be able to see me.”

“Like how only those blessed with the Echo can see Elidibus” I asked.

“Yes, unless we take a mortal vessel only those with the Echo can see us” he replied getting up from the bed. He changed his robes with a snap before turning around to face me. He snapped again and my clothes changed into a simple, but more form fitting pair of black pants with knee high boots and a long sleeved Abyssal Blue top that flared out in the back making It look more like a jacket than a top. “You will fit in more dressed like that.” Emet-Selch explained before leading the way out of the cottage. “The village has an aetheryte that you can attune to” he stated as we walked through the forest. An aetheryte would make frequent trips to the village easier for me especially since I was planning on doing more cooking now. It took us almost a bell to reach the village which was not very large. It had a variety of merchants in the center around the aetheryte and a few homes farther away. Emet-Selch followed me as I looked at the different wares the merchants had to offer. It did not take long to find the merchant who sold foodstuffs, but it was not until after she had packaged everything for me that I realized I did not know what currency was acceptable in this Shard. I doubted that my Gil would be accepted. “Do not worry, Warrior. I have already taken the liberty to change your Gil to the currency of this shard” Emet-Selch told me as if he was reading my mind. Wait, could he read my mind? He had mentioned the first time I stayed in the cottage that I was thinking loudly. “And no, I cannot read your mind. I just guess what you are thinking from your aether and soul” he replied again answering my unasked question. The merchant looked at me expectantly. I had almost forgotten that I was supposed to be paying her. I quickly took out the necessary amount of coins which now looked slightly different than the Gil from the Source. She then handed me my purchase. I knew that I would be able to cook us meals for a few days with the ingredients that I had purchased. They would be simple meals but still taste better than Emet-Selch’s conjured food. It would also make me feel like I was pulling my weight more. We walked back to the cottage in silence. The walk back to the cottage was silent. I had gotten used to Emet-Selch’s either silent observations or snarky or dramatic comments. When we reached the cottage, I began to make a ratatouille with the fresh vegetables I had bought. Emet-Selch sat in one of the chairs at the table and slightly observed me while conjuring every once in a while, the tools I needed to cook. It was unnerving to be observed as I cooked. I had never had someone just watch me especially when I was cooking.

“Don’t you have anything else to do?” I asked him.

“No, I like to watch,” he said. “Or nap” he added a few minutes later.

“Well, you can take a nap” I stated.

“You are interesting to watch,” he replied. I just sighed. I had been hoping that he would take the offer and have a nap so I wouldn’t have to feel his eyes on my back as I cook. I continued to make our meal. Once it was ready, I set it on the table while Emet-Selch conjured us up some plates and silverware. “This is decent,” he said after taking a bit of the meal I had prepared. “Not the best I have eaten but it’s not the worst.”

“I’m sorry, I’m not the best cook” I replied.

“Nothing to apologize for dear. I would have been astounded if you could make a dish that would top some of the best I have eaten with those limited ingredients. I was an emperor for the last 80 years or so. I had some of the best chefs from the entire Garlean Empire cooking for me” he stated.

“You were the Emperor of the Garlean Empire” I asked. I knew quite a bit about the Garlean Empire since my homeland was one of their territories.

“I founded the Empire '' he said, gesturing grandiosity. Modesty did not seem to be his strong suit.

“I can’t compete with the food you are used to, but I would like to continue to make us some meals if that is acceptable” I said quietly.

“Of course,” he said. We finished the rest of our meal in silence before he made the dishes disappear. “Tomorrow we will get back to your training” he said before making his way to his bed. I decided to follow his example and call it an early night as well.


	7. Chapter 7

The next few moons passed quickly. Each day was the same routine. I would wake up early and cook us breakfast. After breakfast, we would head out into the woods so I could train. I had improved tremendously when it came to controlling my aether and had learned to adapt the spells from my Grimoire so I could use them without it. The spells were weaker than if I did have my Grimoire and it felt like I was starting over as a young arcanist again, but I was no longer completely defensive. My creation magicks had not progressed as rapidly. Emet-Selch would often comment that my attempts were comparable to those of a young babe, but every once in a while, he would complement me by saying that it was better than he expected from a sundered soul. Emet-Selch would have me stop training when the sun would begin to set. By that point I was always exhausted. I knew that my aether reserves were minuscule compared to his, but I did not let that stop me. I would work myself to the point of exhaustion because I wanted to learn everything that he could teach me. After we would come back from training I would bathe before dinner and then collapse on to my bed. The nights were getting colder. The fireplace helped keep me warm, but I knew that if the temperature continued to drop it would eventually not be enough. I came from a desert climate and was not used to the extreme cold that seemed to be normal for this Shard or at least this part of the Shard. Emet-Selch seemed unaffected by the cold, but then again, I wasn’t sure if he could even feel cold without having a vessel. Even if he could if he lived in Garlemald for the last 80 years then he was probably use to it.

After collapsing in bed after a long day of training I could not get warm. The fireplace was roaring beside my bed but even that did little to fight the chill. There was a storm brewing outside with high winds that rattled the cottage door. I shivered in the woolen sleepwear Emet-Selch had conjured for me. I was tucked under a heavy blanket as well but even that was not enough to stop my teeth from chattering.

“Your insistent chattering is not letting me sleep,” Emet-Selch said from his bed.

“I apologize but I am freezing” I retorted. I was not in the mood to deal with his snark tonight. He was quiet for a few moments. I assumed that he had somehow managed to fall asleep.

“Come here” he ordered startling me. I turned over to look at his bed. He motioned me over with his hand over his shoulder since his back was still turned towards me. I sighed and slipped out from the covers. I shivered more violently since I had lost the small amount of heat that the covers had provided. “Get under the covers before you get sick. I am not taking care of you if you catch a cold” he said once I was standing next to his bed. I hesitated for a second in confusion before lifting the covers of his bed and laying down besides him. I turned on to my side so that my back was towards his. The covers trapped his body heat making his bed warmer than mine though I was curious how he created body heat if he didn’t have a real body. My thoughts were cut off when I felt him shift and the heat of his body was pressed tightly against my back with his arm tossed over my waist holding me loosely.

“What” I asked, not being able to find the necessary words to completely ask my question.

“Go to sleep,” he said. I sighed but closed my eyes anyway. Now that I was sufficiently warm it was easy to drift off to sleep.

_I was lying in a different bed in a strange room. The room did not look familiar to me but at the same time I felt like I belonged here. It felt like home despite me knowing that I had never been here before. I could tell that the room was chilly, but the warmth of a body cuddled up against me fended off the cold._

_“Must you leave so early” I heard myself say in a strange language that I did not remember ever learning._

_“You know I can’t ignore my duties” the man cuddling with me replied in the same strange language._

_“Not even for a little while. The sun hasn’t even risen yet” I replied. The man behind me sighed._

_“Alright but only until the sun rises, then I must return to my office” he acquiesced. I linked my finger with his and drifted back to sleep._

I woke up slowly and drowsily cuddled up into the warmth along my back. I made a small content noise as I enjoyed the warmth. Wait warmth. All of a sudden, the memories of last night rushed back to me. That warmth that I was very happily cuddling against was Emet-Selch. He had me sleeping besides him because my teeth had been chattering too loudly last night and it was interrupting his sleep. Luckily, he still seemed to be asleep. I felt like I would have died of embarrassment if he had been awake and had heard me contently sigh and felt me cuddle against him. I was content to just lay there for a bit longer, but eventually I grew restless and tried to turn around in his loose embrace. I managed to turn over so that we were now chest to chest. I was surprised to be met with drowsy golden eyes.

His white hair was slightly tousled under his hood but was still framing his face. I had to admit that he was pretty handsome. He didn’t seem to be fully awake yet, but a few moments later his eyes cleared. I could see the shock run through them and felt him go to move his arm.

“I’ve already seen your face. You don’t have to hide it again” I stated.

“You wouldn’t understand how intimate this is” he sighed as if he were disappointed by my lack of knowledge.

“I’m sorry,” I said, lowering my gaze. He sighed again.

“You have no reason to apologize. You do not know of the customs and traditions of Amaurot” he said gently.

“Would you tell me then” I asked. He hesitated for a moment.

“While you make us breakfast, I’ll explain” he finally replied.

“Thank you” I said before getting out of the bed. I shivered as the cold air hit my body through my sleep wear. I felt aether rush over my body and change my sleepwear into a thick black turtleneck and pants. I turned around and gave Emet-Selch, who was still lying in bed a confused look.

“Not going to have you freezing while trying to cook” he replied offhandedly. I turned back around and made my way to the kitchen area so I could start preparing us breakfast. I was very curious about Amaurot but there never seemed to be a good time to ask my questions. After all, how do you go about asking someone who has basically lost everything about what they had lost. For as rude as Emet-Selch could be to me, I felt like we had started to make some sort of progress. He was warming up to me and I did not want to ruin any progress we had made by asking him questions that might cause him to become cold and closed off again. I heard him get up from the bed and walk closer to the kitchen area before he began to speak. “In Amaurot it was considered indecent to be seen without your hood up and mask on, especially in public. The only individuals exempt were those who were too young to understand, but as soon as they entered the Akadaemia they were to follow the same rules as the rest of the city. One only took off their mask in front of someone they shared an intimate relationship with such as their parents, lover or even long-time roommate.” he began. “Everyone wore the same robe and mask except for a selected few.”

“The Convocation?” I asked remembering what he had told me about the Final Days.

“Yes, each of us had a different mask that signified our titles” he replied “We all wore the same black robes except for Elidibus who wears white because he is the Emissary. Our apprentices also wore a different mask than those of the general public. They did not stand out as much as those of the Convocation but had a design so that others could tell which member of the Convocation was their mentor.”

“Apprentices” I questioned.

“A Convocation member would choose one or more apprentices to train in order to take over their position should they retire, or some other ill fate befell them. Apprentices were chosen from Akadaemia Anyder and were always at the top of their class. They each specialized in an area of study which would provide useful to their mentor’s role in the Convocation. For example, I was chosen by the former Emet-Selch because I was talented in Creation Magicks specializing in buildings, but not all apprentices ended up with their expected mentor.” he began before taking a small break. I wanted to know more, but if this was all that he was willing to share today then I was not going to force him to share more. “We had all assumed that a good friend of mine would have been mentored and selected for the position of Halmarut because she was extremely talented in creating flora, but instead she was selected for the 14th seat which also suited her to some extent” he continued a bit muted. I finished cooking us breakfast while he was lost in his thoughts. I was sure that he was remembering his friend who I assumed he lost in the Sundering. I placed our breakfast on the table and took my seat across from him.

“Did it often happen that one person was suited for multiple roles in the Convocation” I asked hesitantly.

“Not often, but there was another whose achievements came before us not long after I had taken my seat on the Convocation. If I remember correctly, she was around Elidibus’ age and managed to catch the eye of Lahabrea, Fandaniel and myself. We were all amazed when Lahabrea expressed his interest in her because he never took an apprentice despite being the oldest member of the Convocation” he replied.

“If I may ask, what was she like?” I asked after taking a few bites of my breakfast. He was silent for enough time that I thought that he would just ignore my question.

“She had entered Akadaemia Anyder through her promise in phantomology or in other words phantom creation, and architecture but those were not her only achievement. She was an exceptional fighter who specialized in many different weapons and could hold her own in rhetoric as well” he explained.

“Seems like she was exceptional all around” I said. Something from Emet-Selch’s description seemed familiar but I could not place how it was familiar. It was an odd feeling similar to when I first smelled the soap Emet-Selch kept conjuring for me.

“Yes, she became Fandaniel’s apprentice but never had the opportunity to take his seat” Emet-Selch concluded. “Finish eating so that we can get on with your training.” I was grateful that he had been willing to share so much information with me.


	8. Chapter 8

I spent the next few weeks sharing a bed with Emet-Selch for warmth. I always slept with my back towards him and he would throw his arm across my stomach, but there was one big difference now. He would take off his mask and hood when we were in the cottage. While it was a little change, I now knew that it was a big deal for him. We still continued to train outside despite the cold weather but the robes he conjured for me kept me warm. I had grown strong enough that Emet-Selch allowed me to teleport to the village and walk back to the cottage on my own. I still wasn’t as strong as I was with my Grimoire. I couldn’t summon any of my Egi or even my carbuncles, but I could cast my weaker damage spells and heal myself if needed. The beasts that roamed close to the road between the village and our cottage were mostly peaceful and those that were aggressive were weak so as long as I was not attacked by a pack of them, I would be fine. Today was one of those days that I got a break from my training in order to go buy fresh ingredients to cook with. Emet-Selch had conjured me a pair of thick black pants, boots, a black turtleneck, and a fur lined grey coat so I wouldn’t be cold when I walked back from the village. He had then returned to bed where I assumed, he would be napping until I got back. I gathered my aether and teleported to the village. I looked around at the different merchants before heading to the one lady who sold all the foodstuffs.

“Hello, it’s nice to see you again” she greeted me. I liked that she never asked me for my name or any other personal information despite me coming once a week. “Would you like the usual?”

“Yes” I replied. “Anything new today?”

“Oh yes we just got this order of fish this morning” she replied excitedly pointing out a few small fish that were laying on ice crystals. I looked at the fish and a recipe came to mind that I couldn’t remember where I had learned it from.

“I’ll take three and can you please add some additional butter and those herbs” I said pointing to a group of herbs.

“Of course,” she replied, quickly packing up my order. I handed her the necessary amount of money and loaded the groceries into the bag that Emet-Selch had conjured for me a while back before walking out of the market area and out of the village. I was halfway to the cottage when I heard a scream for help. I ran in the direction of the scream and found a young boy being attacked by one of the aggressive beasts which reminded me of a direwolf. I immediately gathered my aether and attacked the beast. It howled in pain before running off. I kneeled down by the boy, but the damage had already been done. I knew that even with my best healing spells I would not be able to save his life. The beast’s claws had ripped straight through his chest. I sighed. This boy was too young to deserve this fate. It made me wonder where his parents were. I stood up again and gave the boy one more sad look before turning away. I felt a pain in my chest and gasped. What was that? I knew that I had not been hurt in the fight, but something felt different. The pain subsided so I continued on my path to the cottage. I entered the cottage and found both Emet-Selch and Elidibus inside. Both of them turned to look at me. I noticed that Emet-Selch was wearing his mask and had the hood of his robe on.

“Did something happen on your trip?” he asked. I contemplated telling him about what had happened with the boy, but something in his tone made it seem like he already knew that something was different.

“Yes, one of the aggressive beasts in the forest killed a young boy. I scared it off, but it was already too late for the child, so I left the area but as I was leaving, I felt a strange pain in my chest” I explained.

“It seems like you managed to find another shard of your soul by chance,” Emet-Selch said.

“Nine-fourteenths” Elidibus whispered.

“My soul is almost three-quarters rejoined then” I asked.

“Yes” Emet-Sech replied.

“What does that mean for me?” I asked.

“You should be stronger now. Mayhaps even be able to remember some of your past, '' Elidibus replied. It was a lot to process. I was assuming that Elidibus meant that I would remember some of my memories from when I was unsundered which only brought more questions than answers. Did I also live in Amaurot like Elidibus, Emet-Selch and Lahabrea or did I live somewhere else? Emet-Selch told me that Hydaelyn had sundered the entire world so it was possible. I would worry about this later, but I really hoped that I would begin to remember who I was before I was sundered. Though something told me that the dream I had the first night I shared a bed with Emet-Selch was not just a dream but more of a memory. Mayhaps I had already started remembering.

“Would you like to stay for dinner Elidibus?” I asked.

“I..” he began.

“You should, she is a decent cook” Emet-Selch interrupted him.

“I guess I will then” Elidibus replied. I unpacked my bag and began to cook dinner using the fresh fish I had bought. I was glad that I had decided to buy three instead of two. First, I made a seasoned pastry dough. I had remembered learning how to make pastry dough at the Bismarck but never seasoning it like this. I then prepared the fish. Once the fish was cleaned and seasoned, I wrapped it in the pastry with some vegetables and put it in the oven. It was strange the recipe was very similar to the fish pastry I had learned to make but at the same time very different. I couldn’t place where I had learned to make this variation of the dish. 

Once the fish was ready, I placed it on the table. I saw that someone had conjured another seat for Elidibus. The taste of the dish invoked a strange nostalgic feeling. It didn’t bring up any memories and I couldn’t place why it tasted so familiar but at the same time I knew that I had eaten this dish before. I did not know when I had eaten it, just that I had.

“Where did you learn to make this dish?” Elidibus asked.

“I… I don’t know” I answered hesitantly trying to remember where I had learned to cook this specific dish. “I learned how to make a basic version in the Culinarians Guild, but I can’t recall where I had learned to modify it like this. I must have learned it somewhere.”

“This was a traditional dish served during our version of what is now called the Starlight Celebration on the Source” Emet-Selch explained. “You must be regaining some of your memories now that your soul is 8 times rejoined.”

“But I remembered this recipe when I was in the village before I found the boy who held another shard of my soul” I explained.

“Your soul was already over half complete even before today. Mayhaps that was enough to cause you to remember. Have you remembered anything else from Amaurot?” Emet-Selch asked. I thought about his question. Had I? It was hard to tell, but I knew that Emet-Selch and Elidibus would be able to clarify some things.

“The soap you conjure for me. The scent causes me to feel the same nostalgia I did when I tasted this dish, but also the same confusion. I don’t remember why it’s so familiar all that I know is that it is.” I replied.

“It was your favorite scent back then” he explained simply. Emet-Selch must have known me back then if he knew what my favorite scent was.

“There is one more thing. I don’t know if it is a memory or if it was just a dream, but I dreamed a few weeks ago. I dreamt of an unfamiliar bedroom that felt like home. It was too dark for me to make out the colors of the objects in the room” I began. I blushed a bit at the thought of having to explain the next part of my dream to the two men in front of me. “I was in bed with someone… a man. We must’ve been sleeping. He was holding me close to him as I pleaded with him to stay a bit longer. It seemed like he was very dedicated to his work since he wanted to leave before the sun had risen but I somehow, I managed to convince him to stay at least until the sun rose. I didn’t get to see his face and I woke up shortly after that.” I saw Emet-Selch look at Elidibus but with the mask on I could not see what his facial expression was. Emet-Selch sighed.

“That was most likely a memory of your apartment. You shared it with a male and I know that especially in the winter months the both of you would share a bed. Even back then you hated the cold and had a hard time sleeping in the winter because it was too cold for you even with the heating in our buildings” he explained.

“Roommates? What was the exact nature of my relationship with him?” I asked.

“It is not my place to tell you that” Emet-Selch replied. During our conversation we had managed to finish our meal and Emet-Selch had caused the dishes to disappear. “I shall return shortly” he said, creating a portal and disappearing through it.

“I must also take my leave. Thank you for the meal” he said pleasantly before creating his own portal and leaving. I sighed now alone in the cottage. It seemed like Emet-Selch knew who I had been in Amaurot but was keeping it to himself. Did he want me to remember on my own? Was that why he would only clarify the memories I could remember but not tell me anything else? Well now that I thought about it, I had never asked him directly to tell me about who I was or am? This was confusing. I wanted to know about my past. At least now I knew that I had lived in Amaurot, but still who was I. Did I have a job there? What did I specialize in? Was I strong or was I just average? Or maybe even below average but something told me that that was not the case. Now that I had regained another portion of my soul would it be easier for me to control my aether? I had been left with more questions than answers. I grabbed the blanket from my bed and curled up on the sofa in front of the roaring fireplace. I hoped that I would be able to regain more memories as the day’s past and maybe one day I would have all my memories. I had to admit what I was most curious about at the moment was this supposed roommate of mine. The more I thought of them the more I could feel a deep sense of loss. Were they one of the sacrifices to Zodiark? Had they died in the Final Days before Zodiark or had they been Sundered like I was? Slowly my eyelids began to droop as I stared at the fire lost in my thoughts. I soon succumbed to sleep's sweet embrace.


	9. Chapter 9

_ “Why does it have to be you” I heard myself ask in the strange musical language again as I stared out of a huge glass door. I could tell that we were in a city. There were buildings that reached towards the heavens and some that were smaller. The sky was gray and the weather dreary as if reflecting my mood. My vision was blurring as tears gathered in my eyes.  _

_ “It has to be there is no one else that is strong enough. We need to save those we can” the same voice from my previous dream said. This was the roommate that Emet-Selch wouldn’t tell me about. I wanted to turn around and look at them, but I couldn’t control my body.  _

_ “What about me? I’m strong enough to do this” I pleaded. I felt something warm brush against my senses before arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me into a tight embrace from behind.  _

_ “Thena you are needed here. When this works and we save the world from destruction, you will be needed to help rebuild it” he said resting his chin on my shoulder. _

_ “You are needed to, Quitas. More than I am. You are on the Convocation. I am not. Who is going to step into your seat? You are irreplaceable.” I started my voice cracking.  _

_ “The Convocation will find another” he replied.  _

_ “And what about me. You just think that I will find another. That I can replace you that easily. I will be lost without you” I cried.  _

_ “I don’t want to leave you” he whispered in my ear.  _

_ “Then why” I asked.  _

_ “Because it is my duty to do what is best for the star and for the citizens of Amaurot” he replied. I was getting angry now and felt betrayed.  _

_ “Your duty means more to you than me. Just go. Let me be” I said angrily breaking out of his hold.  _

_ “I’m doing this for you too. So, you can continue to live” I heard him say quietly before hearing the door close. I crumbled to the floor crying and drew my knees to my chest.  _

I woke up to someone gently shaking me. My cheeks were wet, and my eyes ached as if I had been crying. I felt a great sense of loss. 

“Athena focus on me” I heard a voice say before I was lifted and settled on top of someone with my head resting on their chest and hands gently rubbing my back. “It’s ok. Everything is going to be ok” Emet-Selch said softly. I felt warmth brush against my senses like it had in my dream, but it felt different. I could tell that it was from a different person, but at the same time this whole scene felt familiar. I managed to calm down enough to stop my tears but stayed where I was now lying on top of Emet-Selch. 

“This has happened before,” I asked. 

“Yes” he replied simply. 

“Did you used to comfort me often?” I asked lean up a bit to look at his face. 

“Yes, but only after Zodiark was summoned” he replied. 

“Because Quitas chose to sacrifice himself to summon Zodiark” I whispered, taking a guess as to what the conversation in my dream was about.

“Was that what brought this on?” he asked. I could feel the warmth caressing my aether. 

“I dreamt about a fight we had in what I assume was our apartment. I had asked him why it had to be him, and he said that he had to and that it was his duty” I explained. Emet-Selch sighed. 

“’I wish you would remember the good times first instead of the bad ones,” he said. 

“I can’t control it” I snapped at him. 

“I know,” he said. I calmed down a bit now understanding that he wasn’t trying to be mean about it. 

“What’s that warmth? I felt it in the dream and now again, but both feel different but sort of the same” I explained confused. 

“It’s my aether brushing against yours. In Amaurot, it was common for people who were close to each other to allow their aethers to brush against each other like this. It would form a deeper connection than just physical comfort” he said. 

“Were we close back then? You’re aether feels familiar” I asked. 

“Yes” he replied. Another memory surfaced and before I knew what I was doing I had reached up and placed my lips on his. I closed my eyes as he kissed me back. I knew that I was in the cottage but at the same time I could also remember this happening in a different place in a different time. The line between memories and reality blurred a bit as we kissed. I soon had to break away for air and that allowed my mind to clear. I panicked when I realized what had happened.

“I am so sorry. I don’t know why I did that. I just remembered doing that before and I acted on it. I didn’t mean to force myself on you like that. I…” I apologized before Emet-Selch put his finger across my lips.

“Shhh. It’s ok. In case you didn’t notice I reciprocated your kiss” he said gently. “Your memories are slowly coming back, and I understand that in your mind we are little more than strangers, but your soul remembers what we once were.”

“What were we?” I asked.

“When the Sundering happened, our relationship was still budding. We had only just admitted that we had feelings for each other, and you were feeling ready to move on” he explained.

“But I was Sundered while you remained whole” I said, piecing together what had happened.

“Yes,” he said. “Let us rest for now. Your memories will continue to return, and I will help you piece them together as much as I am able to.”

“But you won’t tell me about my relationship with Quitas” I stated.

“That’s not my story to tell,” he said. “Come let’s rest.” He wrapped his arms loosely around my waist and allowed me to snuggle into his chest. Even though I wanted to continue asking questions exhaustion took over and I drifted off to sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning this chapter maybe triggering for some. It contains references to past child abuse.

In the months that followed Emet-Selch and I grew closer. I still barely remembered our relationship in Amaurot despite the snippets of memories I would remember, but the feelings were still there. Emet-Selch was surprisingly patient with me. It was like he had done a complete 180 from the time I first came to live here. We had shared a few kisses and I slept in his arms every night. He had said that our relationship back then was still developing so maybe this right now was not all that different except for maybe knowing each other better back then than we did now. I had also been improving with my training. It seemed that with an additional shard of my soul I was able to not only control my aether better but some basic fundamentals of Creation Magiks were now second nature to me. My aether was still extremely limited but I did try my best to continue to improve. I decided after a day of training that we should get to know each other better.

“Emet-Selch can you tell me a story about you from before the Sundering? I want to get to know you” I asked after I had finished eating my dinner.

“What would you like to know?” he asked.

“Anything, I feel like I don’t know you at all despite having feelings for you. Hells I don’t even know your real name” I explained.

“Hades,” he said.

“What” I asked.

“My real name is Hades. You never had a nickname for me because you said that my name was short enough that I didn’t need one. When it is just the two of us alone you can call me by my name” he said. I nodded my head and then waited patiently to see if he would continue. “You also had asked me to talk about myself back then. We sat on the sofa in your apartment and looked out the window as we spoke about our past. The parts that weren’t common knowledge. You already knew I was a member of the Convocation and my achievements and I knew yours, but we did not know each other very well. I’ll tell you the same story that I told you back then.” I listened intently as he told me about his two childhood friends in Amaurot, Hythlodaeus and Persephone. He would stop to explain to me the words and places that I did not understand or had yet to remember. While I had no memories of his friends, I felt like I was getting to know them through his stories. There was a dull ache in my chest.

“Tell me about your past,” he said.

“I’ve told you about all the memories I’ve regained” I replied confused. He shook his head.

“Not from Amaurot. I still remember what you shared with me back then, but as this fractured being you have had experiences, have you not” he stated. I nodded and nervously rubbed my hands together. He seemed to notice my discomfort. “You do not have to tell me if you do not wish to,” he said, reaching across the table to grab my hand. I shook my head.

“It’s not that I don’t want to. I’m just worried about how you will react. That you will think less of me. Mayhaps we could sit in front of the fire. It will be a long story” I replied hesitantly.

“I doubt that whatever you tell me would make me think any less of you than I did when Elidibus first dropped you off here” he said. It wasn’t much of a comfort, but it did help a bit. We settled down on the sofa in front of the fire. I stared into the fire as I began my story.

“I was born in Ala Mhigo as it became a territory of the Garlean Empire. I was the youngest of four children. My family had chosen to submit to the Empire at the beginning but then my mother got sick. The medic told my father that her illness was caused by complications with her last pregnancy, the one in which she had given birth to me. We had thought that by submitting to the Empire they would provide us with succor but that was not the case and our fellow Ala Mhigians refused to offer us any aid. My mother died just after my 5th nameday and my brothers ran off to join the Resistance blaming the Empire for my mother’s death. What little respect my father had gained in the Empire was destroyed by my brother’s betrayal. My father was obsessed with showing the Empire that we were loyal despite my brothers’ deflection and blamed me for my mother’s death. He heard from one of his friends that if he could provide a …” I began. I swallowed the lump in my throat. I refused to cry. It wasn’t as if Hades hadn’t seen me cry before, but still I wanted to be strong “A willing courtesan then he would be respected. Apparently, the legion preferred someone willing then to have to force themselves on the prisoners.” I could feel anger leak into Hades aether. I assumed that he was angry at me for being so weak. I had gotten better at feeling the aether around me especially his and pressing my own against his. This allowed me to feel his emotions and allowed him to feel mine. 

“Where did he find this willing courtesan? As Emperor I knew that some of the troops enjoyed such pleasures, but I was not aware that they used those incentives in order to procure them” he said, keeping his voice eerily neutral. 

I clasped my hands together and folded into myself. I tried to will the tears that were beginning to form. I felt Hades’ aether rub against mine before he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into his side. I could feel that he was still angry, but he was also worried. “Athena, you can tell me” he tried to comfort me.

“It was me…” I replied. I felt his anger spike. “Father told me that it had to me because it was my fault that we were in this position in the first place and it was up to me to fix it. That I had to make sure that our family was respected so he could find my sister a high-ranking officer to marry and that they would then move to Garlemald. That if I hadn’t killed my mother then my brothers wouldn’t have deflected, and we would still be well respected.” I explained. I couldn’t keep talking. I tried to pull away from him, but he held me tightly against him.

“I’m not angry with you,” he said gently, kissing the top of my head. “None of this was your fault. I am angry with your father for pushing this on you. I would like to know what he did to you to make you so anxious and upset at the possibility of telling me. I know that I was not the nicest to you when you first arrived, but I was hoping that you were learning to trust me more now.”

“I do trust you,” I said. “But I am afraid that you will hate me like you used to when you find out just how broken I am.” Hades sighed.

“I reacted badly to Elidibus dropping you off at my door. I hate to admit it, but I was very irritable that he saw it fit to interrupt my slumber to have me teach you especially since it has always been Lahabrea’s duty. I very much enjoy my sleep and inhabiting a mortal body for over half a century is draining. I was harsher to you then I should’ve been considering that you sought us out. That you are eager to learn of our ways despite supposedly being blessed by Her” he said. I had a feeling that this was the closest that I would ever get to an apology from him.

“You never just apologized back then either” I commented.

“You remember” he asked softly.

“No anything specific, just a feeling,” I replied. “Wait memories!”

“Feel free to continue” Hades said after I had been silent for several minutes. I glared up at him.

“My Echo allows me to see the memories of others. I have no control over it, but would I be able to use it to share my memories with you instead of me having to actually tell you. It's really hard to talk about it” I explained.

“You used to be able to. You had a very strong connection to memories back then. You helped us make our Convocation Crystals before the Final Days” he said, but I understood the unvoiced exception. I used to be able to do this. There was no guarantee that I would be able to do this now with only 9/14 of my soul.

“I can at least try right,” I asked.

“You can but I don’t want you to force yourself if you feel like it's too draining. Your aether is already low from training today” he cautioned.

“I’ll stop if I feel like my aether is going too low” I reassured him before pulling away from him. This time he allowed it. I kicked off my shoes and sat cross-legged on the sofa facing him. I had no idea how to do this. I reached out my hand thinking that maybe a physical connection would help. He turned his body towards me and laid his hand on mine before giving me an encouraging smile. I closed my eyes and focused on my aether. How did I use to do this? I had no memories yet about using this specific power but if Hades said that I could then I must have some memory of doing this.

_“You should’ve been in Rhetoric today. Hermes made a fool of himself. He was completely unprepared” I said sitting on a bed next to an older looking boy with long white hair and blue eyes. He was not quite a teenager yet but had already lost some of his baby fat. The bottom portion of his face was covered by the blankets tucked around him._

_“Thena you shouldn’t sit so close to me. You might get sick too” the boy said._

_“Stop being a worry wart, Quitas. I’m not going to let you fall behind in our lessons because you got sick” I waved off his concern. “Now let me show you my memories of lessons today. I tried really hard to pay attention for you.” The boy who I now knew must’ve been a young Quitas sighed before taking one hand out from under the blanket. I grasped his hand with both of mine. I focused my aether on our connection and willed the memories across the connection I had formed between our aethers. Once I had finished Quitas began to laugh since he had seen for himself how much of a fool our friend had made of himself._

_“You know he’s never going to forgive you for sharing that with me” Quitas said once he managed to control himself._

_“He’ll get used to it. He knows I never keep secrets from you” I replied. “I should let you rest. I’ll be back tomorrow before lessons to see how you are faring.” I stood up from the bed and picked up my bag. I must’ve come to visit as soon as my lessons had ended._

_“Thena, thank you” he said._

_“You’re welcome. What good is this gift if I can’t use it to help those I care about” I said before putting on my mask and throwing the hood of my cloak back over my head. “Rest well,” I said before walking out._

I opened my eyes. “I know how to do this now. I’m going to need to connect our aethers” I explained.

“You saw another memory?” Hades asked. I nodded.

“Apparently I’ve been able to do this since I was young. I remembered sharing my memories of my lessons with Quitas when he was sick” I explained.

“Certain aptitudes develop at a very young age. For example, I can’t remember a time when I could not see a soul or feel my connection to the Lifestream. I am sure that once you regain all your memories you will feel the same way” he said. I nodded.

“I’m going to try now to do the same thing I did in the memory” I said before closing my eyes and focusing on our aethers. I reached out my aether to brush against his but this time instead of just letting it brush against his I focused on mingling a bit of mine into his in order to form a connection. The connection was weaker than the one in my memory. I did not know if that was because I was weaker or if I just didn’t know Hades’ aether as well as I used to know Quitas. I hoped that this connection would be enough. I then focused on showing him the memories of my last few years in Ala Mhigo. I wish that I didn’t have to relive them to show him, but at least I didn’t have to talk about them. It was difficult reliving the beatings and scolding, but what was worst was having to relive the so-called training my father insisted I needed. The countless faceless men who were supposed to teach me how to pleasure them so I would be perfect when my father traded me upon my 18th namesday. I broke off the connection when I couldn’t take the memories anymore, but before fully retracting my aether I felt how furious Hades was. Once the connection was broken, he grabbed me and sat me on his lap so I could cuddle into his chest while I tried to control my emotions again.

“It’s a shame that I faked my death” he mumbled. I made a questioning noise. “If I could still return to the Source as Emperor Solus I would ensure your supposed family regretted treating you in such a deplorable manner” he explained, holding me tight against him.

“The night before my 18th namesday I ran with just the clothes on my back. I stumbled across a group of adventures in the Black Shroud. Well, more like they had to defend me since I was defenseless when I was attacked by one of the creatures that roamed there. One of the adventures was a Scholar who luckily still had her beginner’s Grimoire which she gave to me and helped teach me some of the basics until I could make the trip to Limsa to study at the Arcanist Guild” I said. We sat there in silence for a while as Hades rubbed my arms comfortably. I felt myself start to doze off in his arms.

“Come let’s get some rest” Hades said gently kissing my head. I reluctantly got off his lap and walked over to the bed. I laid down on my side of the bed. I felt Hades lie down as well. “Come here” he said gently pulling me to lay on top of him like I had the other day when I had that nightmare or more like a terrible memory. “You don’t have to worry about any of that now. You will never go back to them” he said holding me tightly to his chest.

“Thank you” I mumbled into his chest. I had never shared this with anyone. I had always been scared. Scared that I would be seen as weak. That no one would be able to see past that part of my past, but here was the man that was supposed to be my enemy. Not only as an Ascian but also as the former Emperor of the Empire that took control of my people. He was angry on my behalf. He didn’t think that I was weak because of it. I had never felt like I had chosen the right side more than I did in this moment. I felt myself doze off.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2nd chapter of the day but this one is really short.

Over the next few months, I grew stronger, but I still could not summon my Ifrit-egi or any of my Egis. I couldn’t even summon a carbuncle. It was very frustrating. I had learned to cast spells that far beyond what I could cast before but still the Egis were beyond me. Hades had even taught me a few of his weaker spells. I didn’t have the aether reserves available to learn all of his spells.

“Why is it that I can use all these advanced spells but still cannot summon my Egis or even a Carbuncle. I learned to summon Emerald Carbuncle very early in my arcanist training and I am way beyond the other spells I had learned at that level” I asked Hades one night over dinner.

“Summoning living creatures was not something I was good at. I could pull souls out of the life stream easily but not create creatures” he replied. “What are your thoughts on Lahabrea?” he asked after a few moments.

“I harbor no ill will towards him, but he surely harbors a lot towards me. I pushed him out of the body he was controlling. I was ignorant back then. I know that that is no excuse, and I will not fault him if he cannot forgive me” I replied.

“Tomorrow we will be taking a trip. I need to speak with Elidibus, and I want you to be present. I have taught you as much as I can right now” he answered.

“Oh, ok” I mumbled, afraid that he just wanted to get rid of me. I heard him sigh. His hand reached across the table and grabbed mine.

“I do not want to get rid of you. I want what is best for you and that means you need to learn not only from me. Back then I was never your teacher. You have so much potential that I can’t help you use” he said. “I will still visit you.”

“Ok” I said, giving him a small smile. We finished our meals in quiet and then headed to bed.


	12. Chapter 12

I was nervous when I woke up the following day. I was not sure where we were going though, I did suspect that it was that dark place I had teleported to all those months ago. I remember Hades asking Elidibus why Lahabrea was not going to be teaching me. Was that why Hades asked me about him last night? Did he want Elidibus to convince Lahabrea to teach me what Hades couldn’t? I sighed. It was no use over thinking this for now. I would find out soon enough. I managed to lightly doze off again while waiting for Hades to decide to wake up. I was gently roused by Hades moving behind me on the bed.

“Let’s get this over with” he mumbled groggily into my hair despite not letting go of me just yet. It was at that moment that I realized he was just as reluctant about this meeting as I was. He let go of me after a few more minutes and I got up. With a snap Hades had changed back into his ornate black robe and red mask while my own clothes had changed to a simple black robe and I could feel the light weight of a mask on my own face.

“Why” I asked him.

“It will be best if anyone else who lingers in the Rift cannot identify you” he answered simply. He walked closer to me before creating the black and purple portal that would take us to what I assumed was the Rift. “Ready” he asked. I nodded even though I was still hesitant about this. Together we stepped through the portal and into the Rift. It was very dark. I could barely see in front of me. I felt Hades grab my hand to guide me. I could feel the crystal in my necklace react as we stepped into a room. I could barely see pillars in the room but there was a strange light in the middle. I could not tell where it was coming from, but it illuminated Elidibus form. I went to walk closer to Elidibus, but Hades held me back and covered my form with his. I was confused but before I could ask him a new familiar figure emerged.

“I have answered thy summon Emissary. Speak and make thine intent known” I heard Urianger say. Hades had allowed us to get close enough so I could hear the conversation, but I was still far enough away that I would not be spotted though I doubted that even Urianger would recognize me in this robe and mask.

“I would speak of fate, Archon. Yours, mine – the fate of this very star” Elidibus replied. Hades and I remained in the shadows as they spoke. I already knew the information, so I let my mind wander. Why was Urianger here? Was he the Scions new spy? Once their conversation had concluded and Urianger had left, Hades led me to where Elidibus was still standing.

“I was wondering when you would show yourself,” he said.

“You know I like to watch,” Hades replied. “But I am here to discuss something with you.” Elidibus turned his attention towards me.

“What is it?” he asked.

“You need to convince Lahabrea to take her on as a student. You know that I cannot teach her everything. She has mastered all that I can teach her to this point. She has even learned how to use her gift with Memories.” Hades replied.

“You seem to have changed your perspective on the matter, Emet-Selch” Elidibus replied no doubt referring to how Hades didn’t think I was capable at first.

“There was something blocking her from accessing her aether, but once she managed to overcome that she mastered the basics faster than any of the others” Hades explained. A block on my aether? Was that why I struggled so much in the beginning? “That of course is to be expected with whose soul she shares. I know that you know exactly who she is, Elidibus, and that she needs Lahabrea to help her remember her full abilities.”

“I do not know what you speak of,” Elidibus said, though I could tell that he was hiding something. I wasn’t sure how I knew what his tells were. It was another one of those familiar feelings that I had yet to remember the memories associated with it.

“Do not be draft, Elidibus. I know that you do not have all your memories anymore, but I know that you would never forget those memories. We need to convince Lahabrea that she is on our side. She holds no grudges against him, isn’t that right dear” Hades said turning slightly to me during the end. I nodded.

“I harbor no ill will towards Lahabrea. I hope that he can come to realize that I was an ignorant fool then and have since grown” I said. Elidibus quietly sighed.

“If you think it is for the best then we will try to convince him” he said reluctantly.

“We” Hades asked.

“Yes, you will be there to help me convince him,” Elidibus said. Hades sighed.

“If you insist, but you were always better at making him listen than I was,” he said.

“I am not taking any chances with her safety” Elidibus said in a tone that left no room for arguments.

“Do you truly believe that he will attack me?” I asked. Elidibus was worrying me. There was no way I would be able to defend myself from Lahabrea’s attack if he truly wanted to kill me. I had only survived last time due to Her Blessing.

“That will not happen,” Hades replied. “Will you summon Lahabrea?” Elidibus nodded.

I was anxious as we waited for Lahabrea to come. I felt Hades aether brush calmly against mine though we stood a respectable distance away from each other. I was unsure if he had told Elidibus of my slowly returning memories or of whatever was going on between us. I let my appreciation flow through my own aether as I calm down a bit.

“I thought we had agreed to move forward swiftly” Lahabrea said when he appeared.

“We had but there is one more thing I would like to discuss with you. I have found a promising student for you to take under your wing” Elidibus said calmly.

“If we are to usher along the next Rejoining quickly, I do not have time to waste teaching another fragmented soul just for them to die before they can master our ways” he retorted.

“This one is different than the rest. She already has had her soul rejoined 8 times and has already learned the basics from Emet-Selch” Elidibus stated.

“There has only been 7 Calamities” Lahabrea stated.

“Yes, she managed to find another fragment of her soul and rejoin it while she was with Emet-Selch on the Ninth” Elidibus explained.

“If she shows such promise then why have you not brought her to my attention sooner” Lahabrea said. Everything would rely on this moment. Would Lahabrea want to kill me on the spot for what happened, or would he agree to teach me? A heavy tension rose between all of us.

“Because I was unsure of what your reaction would be, but Emet-Selch stated that I am doing her an injustice by hiding her away from you” Elidibus said. Hades pulled me closer to his side. There seemed to be some sort of nonverbal communication between Hades and Elidibus before Hades pulled down my hood revealing my raven-colored locks and I felt the mask evaporate.

“Is this a trick” Lahabrea stated.

“It is not. I went to test her after her fight with you. She passed my test, but when I went to take my leave assuming that she would not want to hear about our goals she surprised me by stopping me to ask about them. Thus, I took her to the Ninth so Emet-Selch could explained everything to her. I had thought that it would change nothing but was surprised to overhear that she did not want to return to the Source and fight against us. I forced her to return but she continued to meet with me in private and pass along any information she could” Elidibus began.

“If she was supposedly our informant then why is she here and not on the Source” Lahabrea interrupted.

“Because the Scions asked too much of me. They wanted me to kill all of you. They figured out how to with White Auricite and once they forced me to kill Nabriales I knew that I had to leave. I fake my death as soon as I could and fled here” I explained quietly.

“She teleported to my side and I took her to Emet-Selch. He has been teaching her for almost a year now on the Ninth though barely any time has passed on the Source” Elidibus said.

“And you trust her” Lahabrea said.

“If you could see souls as I can then you would trust her as well” Hades said.

“Who is she” Lahabrea asked.

“For once just trust my judgement” Hades replied before the three of them lapsed into a tense silence. Why did Hades not want to tell me exactly who I use to be? He had dropped hints here and there but had never fully explained just who I had been. I clasped my hands together as I waited anxiously for Lahabrea to decide if he was going teach me or not.

“Fine” Lahabrea finally spat. “But if she turns against us it will be your fault” he said to Hades. “I will test her myself to see just how well she has truly mastered the basics of Creation. If she fails, then I will not waste my time.”

“You never did have patience for those who did not meet your standards” I stated easily as if I had said something similar a hundred times before. As soon as I realized what I had said I tried to shy away but Hades held me besides him. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I said that” I apologized. I let my aether brush hesitantly against Lahabrea’s so he could feel that I was truly apologetic about my previous statement and was surprised when I could tell that he was shocked. Something told me that he was not surprised often, and it was even rarer for him to be shocked into silence.

“How” Lahabrea asked. I was confused. How what?

“I don’t know, but we should not question it” Hades replied. I looked up at him confused. “Don’t worry about it, my dear. We will explain in due time” he told me. Whatever had surprised Lahabrea must’ve had to do with my prior identity. I hated being left in the dark like this especially since I did not know why. Why wouldn’t they tell me the entire story of who I was?

“Why not now” I asked quietly. Hades looked at Elidibus. Whatever was holding him back had to do with Elidibus but what did Elidibus have to do with this.

“Have a little more patience. I understand it must be confusing, but it will be even more so if I try to explain while also withholding information that is not mine to share” he said.

“Ok” I sighed. What information did he have to withhold? Did it have to do with Quitas? If everyone else was Sundered beside the three who stood around me, then who would be able to explain everything to me. Was Elidibus or Lahabrea Quitas? No, it couldn’t be. Lahabrea’s aether didn’t feel like Quitas and I was sure that Elidibus would have told me that we knew each other in the past if that was the case. Maybe Elidibus had been closer to him than Hades and that’s why Hades always looked at him before answering those questions.

“I will test you now since I don’t have anymore time to waste” Lahabrea stated. While I didn’t know exactly how I knew, I knew that Lahabrea had not changed much since the Sundering. He had always been this impatient. I couldn’t remember who he had been to me, but I was hoping that I would be able to one day. These almost instinctual feeling about him made me think that I had actually known him before not just known of him. Hades helped me teleport to a large clearing in a red forest. The sky was grey as if it were about to rain at any moment. I had never seen a place like this on the Source, so I assumed that we must’ve traveled to another shard. “Let’s see how well you fair against me this time without Her Blessing and your book” Lahabrea said before sending an attack towards me. I dodged out of the way. He was faster than I remembered or maybe it was Hydaelyn’s Blessing that had made him seem slower. I could barely get off a cast of my own before I had to dodge again. Titan-Egi’s shield would be really useful right now. Hell, any of my summons would be useful now. I would even settle for Eos or Selene at this point. At least they could heal me if I got hit by any of Lahabrea’s attacks. My aether soon began to falter. I knew that I was using more aether than necessary for my attacks since I couldn’t focus on gathering the perfect amount since I was constantly dodging. I had yet to land a successful hit against Lahabrea and was rapidly running out of options. I could feel exhaustion creeping into my bones. I didn’t know how long we had been at this.

“That’s enough” I heard Elidibus call out, but Lahabrea did not stop his assault.

“Lahabrea, she strong for being sundered but not as strong as she was before. Stop it before you kill her” Emet-Selch stated. I could faintly make out the worry in his voice. Lahabrea attacked once more but I was too exhausted to move. I collapsed onto my knees hoping to duck out of the way of the attack, but as it approached, I knew that there was nothing I could do to escape. I used the last of my aether to try and summon some sort of shield. I had to do something to protect myself. I closed my eyes to focus, but my aether was too low. I felt the aether gather around me and heard a loud trill before I passed out.


	13. Chapter 13

_I was back in the apartment from my prior memories but this time I was sitting on a sofa leaning against a warm body and staring at what looked like a black marble fireplace._

_“I heard the Esteemed Lahabrea has chosen you to work on an experiment with him” the voice I recognized as Quitas stated from behind me. I must be leaning up against him._

_“He has. If you plan on distracting me from celebrating your own achievements by mentioning mine, then you are going to be disappointed” I told him._

_“Lahabrea prefers to work alone. The fact that he has chosen you to work with him is an extraordinary accomplishment” he explained._

_“I understand that, but you have been chosen as an apprentice to a Convocation member. You are far to humble, Quitas” I replied._

_“Yes, though rumors have it that Lahabrea is considering making you his apprentice” he said. His arm wrapping my shoulders._

_“That is highly unlikely. Lahabrea has never taken an apprentice before” I scoffed._

_“Your skills in rhetoric are exceptional” he stated._

_“We shall see, but for now let’s rest. Tomorrow we both have busy days” I said._

_“Of course, my love” he whispered before kissing the top of my head._

I startled awake. It seemed that Quitas and I were much closer than Hades had hinted at before.

“How do you feel” Elidibus asked me. I noticed that he was standing next to the bed I was resting on. I was not back in the cottage I had been sharing with Hades but instead in a different one.

“Tired” I replied.

“That is to be expected after draining your aether again” Hades stated from where he was lounging in a chair on the other side of the bed.

“I didn’t have much of a choice, but I guess even with that it wasn’t enough to convince Lahabrea to train me” I said quietly.

“That is untrue” a voice said from behind Elidibus before Lahabrea moved into my line of sight. “Your power caught my interest as soon as you sent the first spell without your book to assist you in channeling your aether.”

“Then why continue” I asked.

“Because I wanted to see the true limit of your power. You are still Sundered but yet have been Rejoined multiple times. Before the Sundering you were immensely powerful, and I wanted to see how much of that power you have regained” he explained.

“Was that immense power the reason we worked together in the past” I asked hesitantly.

“It was part of the reason. Your aptitude for Phantom Creation being the most important reason for my decision to allow you to assist me on some of my more difficult projects such as the one you managed to summon by utilizing the natural atmospheric aether before passing out from exhaustion” Lahabrea explained.

“I summoned something” I asked in shock.

“Not just something. You somehow managed to summon a Phoenix out of all things” Hades said.

“A Phoenix” I asked. I had no idea what he was talking about.

“A bird with the affinity to fire. It was one of our last projects together before the Final Days. A project that took both of us together to summon and Emet-Selch’s assistance to send it back to the Life Stream. It was the last thing I expected you to summon on your own, but you managed. Not only did you manage to summon one that looked almost identical to the one we had summoned together all those years ago, but you also managed to modify it in a way that would protect you from my attack. My attack would not have killed you, but it would have surely injured you” Lahabrea explained.

“I’m sorry. I don’t remember a phoenix” I said.

“No need to apologize, my dear. Your memories will return in due time” Hades stated.

“I have collected some materials for you to review as we wait for your aether reserves to refill. We will also have to work on your ability to utilize the atmospheric aether before depleting your own aether reserves. It was never something you had to worry about before since you had unnaturally large aether reserves but now that you are only a fraction of the being you were then we will have to work around your smaller reserves. It is not impossible, but it will take time and effort on your part. I have other matters to attend while you read these. Afterwards we will begin to work on your ability to draw atmospheric aether. This shard shall work nicely for that purpose since the atmosphere is heavily saturated in aether” Lahabrea explained setting a stack of parchment on the bedside table before disappearing through a portal.

“I guess I should get reading then” I stated looking at the immense stack.

“Rest for now. You can begin in the morning. This cabin is just outside a small village so you will be able to get fresh ingredients to cook for yourself” Hades explained. Elidibus had been strangely silent though I could feel his glaze on me. “We will leave you to rest for now.”

“Remember to eat and sleep. Your studies can always wait for later” Elidibus said before also disappearing through a portal. I snuggled back under the covers. Those words sounded familiar as if I had heard them a hundred time before, but I could not remember who had said them.

“Will you be staying” I asked Hades.

“I can’t. I’ve been tasked with preparing another Shard for the next Rejoining” he replied. “I will stop by as I can.”

“That’s ok. I doubt I would be good company with all that reading” I replied.

“You were never bad company even when immersed in your studies” he replied. “Rest well” he said before disappearing through a portal to which ever Shard he had been tasked to deal with. I felt my eyes slowly close in exhaustion.


End file.
